To: editors, creative directors, and assorted hiring personnel at the New York Times, Washington Post, The New Yorker, McSweeney’s, The Onion, PennySaver, et al.
From: lé pencil pusher
Re: Your glorious future
Please consider me for freelance projects. My work will make you look better than a closetful of Prada and trippy eyeglasses. Maybe.
lé pencil pusher